Winter is finally almost over – trees are budding, animals are coming out of hibernation and even people are “thawing out” after the long, cold days of winter. It’s time to get ready for spring!

After a Loss – The death of a loved one can feel like bitter days of winter. You go into hibernation and turn inside yourself to cope with your pain and sorrow. It may be months before you pick your head up and look around to realize that you’ve been immersed in your grief for so long that you’ve turned out everything else: your family, your friends, even the change of seasons. You can only just now start to look around and move a little more outside yourself. It is the time in your grief journey when your heart and soul being to “bud” with little shoots of hope—when you can recall your loved one’s death and still feel sorrow, but you call being to remember the joy of your relationship.

“Spring Cleaning” Your Heart & Soul – You will feel a momentum inside you when it is time to start “spring cleaning” your grief. Many people in your life may think they know when it’s best for you to start this process. Friends and family may tell you to “get over it and move on,” often before you are ready. But ONLY you will know when the time is right. Respect your own timeline for grief; it will be different from everyone else’s. One suggestion – DO NOT DO ANYTHING DRASTIC FOR ONE YEAR! The first year after a loved one dies is full of “firsts” – first holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, etc. Your loved one’s death is often too new and the grief is too overwhelming for you to make any major decisions such as moving, changing careers or beginning new relationships. Allow yourself to ease back into life. How you feel right after a death and how you will feel in a year will be different. Commit to the “one-year” rule, and when that is over, take a deep breath and take control of your life.

The “Stuff” Does Not Equal the Person – One really great way to do this “spring cleaning” is to include someone who loves and understands this bittersweet time. Reminisce about your loved one. As you go through their belongings, tell stories of the life you shared with that person. There is comfort in the shared joy and sadness this task will bring. And sometimes, knowing you are helping others can relieve some of the grief you are feeling. Many people give away some of the stuff they clean out to charities so that the gift of their loved one’s life can go on. Keep your most treasured/favorite items to celebrate the life of the person who has died, and if you want, display them proudly!

Seasons Change but Love Never Dies – The death of a loved one is devastating. But death and loss are NOT the final word. Seasons change, and with death, relationships change too. And in the circle of life, spring always follows winter, and new life grows from the greatest despair and loss. Embrace your pain, and when you are ready, do some “spring cleaning” and start letting it go. Your emptiness will be filled with new gifts and ways of loving